Ridiculous! Ludicrous! Far too specific! This would undermine everything!

Personally, I think there should be MORE money in politics. In fact, I say do away with voting entirely. Replace it, instead, with glass jars for each candidate. [...]]]>

Occupy Albany released a statement read by John Jaye outlining their demands.

Occupy Albany has made a shocking, controversial, and altogether unfathomable demand: to take money out of politics.

Ridiculous! Ludicrous! Far too specific! This would undermine everything!

Personally, I think there should be MORE money in politics. In fact, I say do away with voting entirely. Replace it, instead, with glass jars for each candidate. Whoever collects the most cash wins, and then that cash is used to run the country as those people see fit. This way we ensure our representatives are working the hardest they can for our dollars, and only the most hard-working fundraisers will be in positions of influence. Also, corporations should be represented by living, breathing cyborgs that can they also run for office.

I’m being facetious, but not because I think the notion is ridiculous. But because I don’t think it’s nearly specific enough and as a liberal myself, I take offense to the notion that the demands and regulations being alluded to in the most vague possible manner here should just be universally accepted by any and all of this “99%” people keep talking about (the use of which does more to stifle conversation than encourage it and really needs to be abolished). Particularly when I and many others might (*gasp!*) disagree with the positions they are holding as universal to the variety of ideologies they represent.

I want to run down, point by point, the specific measures and issues they are demanding to be addressed “in the short term.”

• Truly effective campaign finance reform. Okay. How and what aspects? It’s not as simple as just saying it. If it were, McCain-Feingold would have been stronger and more effective. Sadly, it was not. But there are a variety of factors that need to be addressed first before we try to tackle campaign finance reform as an issue. Mostly because it is not an issue but rather more of an idea and long-term goal, and the sooner you treat it as such the easier it becomes to address. Categorizing it as a “short-term” goal, as Occupy Albany explicitly states, is a wonderful thought but literally impossible and, really, self-defeating.
• Corporate personhood. This is a tricky one. It’s a phrase invoked by my fellow lefties to elicit outrage from those who believe (as I do) that corporations are often given more preference in legal and political manners than the individual in this country. It doesn’t help when members of the GOP like Mitt Romney snarkily respond to criticisms by stating that “corporations are people too, friend.” What he actually meant, even though ideologically avoiding the issue, is that corporations consist of real people and are not wholly faceless entities. In the literal sense he is right. But the problem is that the influence of a corporation as a collective group is very narrow and self-serving, yet can overwhelm the influence and interests of the people. So what do you do in that case? Do we eliminate corporate personhood entirely? Absolutely not! Part of corporate personhood that doesn’t get acknowledged is that it also serves to protect us from them. Although expanded through legal decisions in the twentieth century, the concept also allows for us to do things like sue a corporation as an entity rather than every single person within that corporation and/or specific people, making it not just easier but literally possible to seek retribution for their transgressions (otherwise we’d be priced out and exhausted by legal fees and logistics). It also makes it easier for us to hold them accountable, financially and otherwise, when they break the law and/or imposed regulations. The other problem is that the more objectionable aspects of corporate personhood aren’t the result of legislation but rather, as Occupy Albany themselves point out, legal precedent. So it’s not as simple as passing a law undoing the concept of corporate personhood and stripping them of that status, as doing so would have consequences on our ability to pursue legal action against them, protect ourselves from their abuses, etcetera.
• Incentive structure for representatives. I’d love to hear what they are actually proposing. If it’s a matter of simply raising income for representatives…well, good luck convincing a cynical populace that they should pay politicians that they’re unhappy with more money that the government does not have.
• Changing the culture of disinformation and divisiveness rampant in our society. If you read letters and statements going back as far as the Founding Fathers, the sting of rhetoric, divisive stances, and politicians parading as ideologues is hardly a new phenomenon. You can and should call it out whenever you see it. It’s childish, anti-intellectual, misleading, and manipulative. But to think that you’re going to solve it through any action or actions is, I’m sorry, childishly naive.

Occupy Albany’s permit for encampment in Academy Park ends today. They show no signs of leaving, citing that it would be more effective for them to be present when legislators return to session early next month.

The video and full text transcript (typed out by yours truly – you’re welcome) of Occupy Albany’s statement is after the jump.

Thank you for joining us on this special day.

There has been much speculation in the media as to why we have been occupying Albany. What is the reason we are going through all this hardship? Struggling through tough weather and putting careers on hold?

We are proud to announce that within the movement’s rich ideological diversity, we are issuing a formal demand. The people of Occupy Albany hereby make the following statement, which represents a powerful commonality within a diversity of beliefs and goals.

We have joined together to occupy as an affirmation of the virtue of democracy where each person has an equal voice in shaping our common future. While we come from diverse background and world views, we stand united in the recognition that our current system is failing us. The voice of the people is drowned out by the corruptive influence that concentrated economic power exerts on the government. The interests of those who purchase influence are awarded at the expense of the people, for whom the government’s just power is to be derived. We believe that this failure in our system is at the core of many interconnected issues we face as a society and its resolution is key to a just future.

We therefore demand true democracy, unshacked from the corrosive influence of concentrated economic power, and ask all who share in this common goal to stand with us and take action towards this end and statement.

As more and more concentrated money tramples on the political will of the people, there is a growing movement for real democracy in the air. From Tunisia to Egypt, to the Occupy movements throughout the country, the demands for genuine democracy are echoing across the globe. While in this country we have the right to vote, we at Occupy believe that voting does not ensure that our representatives are serving our interests. To get elected, they must sell themselves to the highest bidder. And once in power, they are put under intense pressure by lobbyists. Lobbying firms who in many case write legislation and directly hand them to our politicians. And all too often, the people appointed to oversight in specific industries have interests directly linked to these industries; to the very industries they are supposed to regulate.

So who’s interests are the government serving?

We believe that by the very nature of our system, our representatives serve with deep conflicts of inflicts; conflicts between the public good and the good of concentrated economic powers which have corrupted the system. This is not sustainable. This is not tolerable.

At Occupy Albany, over the last few weeks, we have been developing a strategic road map to address in the near term issues of campaign influence, lobbying influence, and the revolving door. Included in this planning are measures towards a truly effective campaign finance reform, overturning the horrible legal precedence of corporate personhood, changing the incentive structure of our representatives so that they are truly working for the people, changing the culture of disinformation and divisiveness rampant in our society, and other near term measures. The end goal of this is true democracy.

We understand that this demand is broad and bold. This was intentional. The challenges we face as a society are simply too great to believe that baby steps and watered down compromises will be effective. Accordingly, this demand does not set a limit on what is possible. This system is broken and this must be addressed systematically to the root for the future of this generation and generations to come. We have a legacy and we owe it to them and we owe it to ourselves.

The occupy movement have given the voiceless a voice, and this voice will continue to grow louder. This voice will return our system of government to the people.

Tune in tonight as I join host Ethan Ullman to discuss a multitude of topics including but not limited to comedy in the Capital Region, childhood memories, the August 23rd Earthquake (hit the streets and never forget), and [...]]]> Tonight, the comedy radio program Alternative 2 Sleep on WCDB has a very special guest.

ME!

Tune in tonight as I join host Ethan Ullman to discuss a multitude of topics including but not limited to comedy in the Capital Region, childhood memories, the August 23rd Earthquake (hit the streets and never forget), and a pending career move for yours truly. What is it? You’ll have to tune in to find out!

Listen LIVE tonight and every Thursday, 10pm to midnight.
terrestrial airwaves: 90.9FM in Albany, NY

Or listen online:

• through the WCDB website
• on iTunes
• Live video stream

The article focuses on the roundabouts that have been installed throughout the region [...]]]>

"Roundabouts have been installed throughout the Capital Region. ARE THEY GOING TO KILL YOUR CHILDREN? More at 11."

I’d like you to take a look at the headline to your right, which is what greeted me this morning when I went to check the news at the Albany Times Union‘s website.

The article focuses on the roundabouts that have been installed throughout the region to replace congested intersections coming off the Northway. A report shows that accidents have increased at the multi-lane roundabouts, from an average of 7.8 collisions a year to 45.7 at the Malta roundabout and 9.6 to 38.3 at the New Scotland/Route 140  roundabout.

Buried after the lead (note: most people read the first two to three paragraphs of a story, if that) is the fact that the roundabouts actually accomplish what they set out to do: reduce or outright eliminate more severe and sometimes fatal accidents.

Accidents in roundabouts tend to be less severe than at intersections with traffic lights. Rather than crash into each other head on or smack together in a T-bone crash, as drivers making lefts at conventional traffic lights often do, drivers in roundabouts tend to sideswipe and rear-end each other.

“The potential for high-speed, severe accidents is eliminated,” Kennedy said.

Which is the whole point.

The apprehension towards roundabouts comes largely from the fact that people in this area don’t pay attention to what the Hell they’re doing on the road. I see it even on the streets of Troy and Albany, with people taking left turns without using directionals, pulling out of spots without looking in their rearview mirror, and various other traffic infractions. Officials cite aggressiveness, but really it’s just laziness and carelessness. As an aside, Daniel Nester had a great piece about the “Albany Left Turn” and the “Late Left Turn Signal” on his blog)

Thankfully, things like Roundabouts are finally installed in this area so we can all be big boys and girls and drive responsibly. The number of accidents has increased, but it’s still relatively low.

More importantly, they’re minor. Fifty scraped bumpers is preferable to a dozen dead bodies.

So the answer to the question that wasn’t asked before the headline was written: no, it’s not a “vicious circle.” It’s a more responsible and efficient means of addressing problems this area has had with people getting T-boned in intersections.

Unfortunately, since most people don’t read past the first handful of paragraphs in any given newspaper article, the resistance to roundabouts will be cultivated so long as those very same people also aren’t doing things like yielding and looking in front of them.

See also: Pete Iorizzo’s take, “Bad drivers, not roundabouts, are the problem”

Stop on by and join your favorite blogger (me, ‘natch) and other fine folks for some food, fun, and fine banter.

Dining Out for Life benefits the AIDS Council of Northeast New York. Eat breakfast, lunch, [...]]]> I’m here  at FLAVOUR CAFE (228 4th Street, Troy) this morning until 10:00am as part of 2011 Dining Out for Life.

Stop on by and join your favorite blogger (me, ‘natch) and other fine folks for some food, fun, and fine banter.

Dining Out for Life benefits the AIDS Council of Northeast New York. Eat breakfast, lunch, or dinner at any of these restaurants and 25% of your bill will go to the AIDS Council of Northeastern New York. Even better, all the money you help raise is guaranteed to be spent right here in the Capital Region.

If you do come out to Flavour or go to any of the participating restaurants, take a picture of yourself at your table with a piece of Dining Out for Life literature (such as a table tent, drawing envelope, etcetera) and e-mail it to events at AIDSCouncil.org. By doing so you’ll be entered to win a gift certificate for one of the participating restaurants!

So come join! You can give to a great cause and win some swag yourself.

If you can’t make it out at all but still want to contribute, just go to any of the participating locations or donate directly to the organization online.

I rarely if ever do. The last time I actually went out for breakfast was with an ex-girlfriend. Of course, at the time she wasn’t an ex, and I genuinely looked forward to those rare times when we’d venture out for breakfast. There’s something more intimate, and [...]]]> When’s the last time you went out for breakfast?

I rarely if ever do. The last time I actually went out for breakfast was with an ex-girlfriend. Of course, at the time she wasn’t an ex, and I genuinely looked forward to those rare times when we’d venture out for breakfast. There’s something more intimate, and peaceful, about having the first meal of the day with someone you care about as opposed to lunch or dinner. Going out for breakfast or having it with a girlfriend (or boyfriend) is one of the more underrated and undervalued activities one can do with a significant other.

Wow, I just made myself depressed.

Help me feel better and drown my sorrows with coffee and breakfast fixings tomorrow at FLAVOUR CAFE (228 4th Street, Troy) from 7:30am – 10:00am as part of 2011 Dining Out for Life. Not only will you get to meet your favorite blogger along with some other fine folks, but you’ll also be helping a great cause.

Dining Out for Life benefits the AIDS Council of Northeast New York. Eat breakfast, lunch, or dinner at any of these restaurants and 25% of your bill will go to the AIDS Council of Northeastern New York. Even better, all the money you help raise is guaranteed to be spent right here in the Capital Region.

Last year’s Dine-Out-a-Thon netted in excess of $48,000.

Hope to see you all tomorrow! If you can’t make it out at all but still want to contribute, just go to any of the participating locations or donate directly to the organization online.

And I let out a sigh. A deep, deep sigh.

"Best grocery chain: PRICE CHOPPER! Best deli: PRICE CHOPPER! Best bakery: PRICE CHOPPER! Best auto dealership: PRICE CHOPPER! Best singer-songwriter: PRICE CHOPPER!"

On Friday, amidst the fake news and relationship changes on Facebook (I wonder how many unmarried women out there  did the “I’m pregnant!” prank only to be taken aback when no one acted surprised), the Times Union launched its annual Best of the Capital Region poll.

And I let out a sigh. A deep, deep sigh.

CLICK HERE to vote.

It’s not entirely the readers’ fault. Unfortunately, there just isn’t enough emphasis put on homegrown business and actual quality by our local media. That extends past the Times Union and is for a variety of reasons; i.e. a company like Price Chopper has more of a presence because they can afford the advertising time. There’s also the problem of false equivalence inherent in these types of things: popularity and quality are not universally proportional. That is, unless you think Taylor Swift really is, like, the best, like, writer of songs about stupid ex-boyfriends EVAR.

Which is why I’m not going to tell you who to vote for; though I do think if you’re unsure in any category, your best bet is to defer to the “Fussy Little Ballot” over on Daniel B.’s FUSSYlittleBLOG. Unlike me, he’s a foodie and a transplant to the area who has invested time in discovering all the little treasures and great things the area has to offer. He also has a method to his madness, so go check it out.

I am, however, going to encourage you to do two things:

1. Vote for the best.
2. Don’t vote in a category you’re ignorant about. Say, for instance, you don’t know much about local restaurants. Then, hey, don’t vote in that category. Or if you don’t know what Twitter is? Opt out of voting for “best local Tweeter.” Do you hang out on North Pearl Street on the weekend and spike your hair with gel? Then don’t vote on anything. At all. Okay? Just don’t. Please.

My (partial) ballot is below, if only to give you an idea of what a deluded jerk I am.

Best bakery – The Cookie Factory (Troy, NY)
Best farmers market – Troy Farmer’s Market
Best men’s fashions – J.C. Penny’s like a mother effer! What? I shop there, and I am not ashamed. (prepares to be chastised by Alan Ilagan)
Best bookstore (single location) – Market Block Books (Troy, NY)
Best used bookstore – Dove & Hudson (Albany, NY) Not just for price – which almost can’t be beat – but also for the fun of finding real treasures. A truly remarkable and charming space.
Best auto dealer (single location) – Fuccillo Hyundai They got good people there is all I’m sayin’.
Best coffee joint (single location) – Flavour Cafe Awesome hours, awesome staff, plus: THE BOOTY SHAKE.
Best gym/health club – NY Boxing (Cohoes, NY) You think you’re in shape until you go in and take a class with the Miller boys.
Best high school coach (include name and school) / Best high school athlete – boys (include name and school) / Best high school athlete – girls (include name and school) – Isn’t it kind of weird to have a vote in this if you don’t have a kid that plays? I don’t know, I just always found the concept of adults with a vested interest in high school sports that their children don’t play to be a bit baffling. I mean, I’m always like “good for them,” but…yeah. Maybe it’s just me.
Best concert in the past year – Restoration Festival @ St. Joseph’s Church What a blast this was, and I hope it comes back this Summer.
Best singer-songwriter – Matthew Carefully
Best band (pop/rock/country) – Que Caro
Best local comedian or comedy troupe – Greg Aidala
Best movie theater – Spectrum 8
Best place for kid-friendly arts and culture – The Arts Center (Troy, NY)
Best TV news anchorperson – Greg Floyd OM GF!
Best TV newscast – The Glen Slingerland Situation BREAKING NEWS: fetishized women in short black dresses and sunglasses terrorize local neighborhood. It’s a high-heeled Kegs & Eggs out there, folks!
Best print journalist – James M. Odato His work on the exploits of NXIVM alone deserves recognition.
Best radio station – WEXT Really the only radio station that “gets it,” in the sense that with the industry disappearing, they know that the only interest we have in earthbound stations would be with a hyper local focus. And they give it, in spades, rather than simply paying lip service to it like some other stations do. That said, guys, I love you to death, but it wouldn’t kill you to skew younger in your coverage. But that goes for all music coverage, whether through terrestrial airwaves or in print or on blogs.
Best local website – All Over Albany
Best local blogger – KC Orcutt of Keep Albany Boring
Best local tweeter – @patrickdodson

Alright, kids, get to votin’.

Growing up in the Capital District, there were at least two that I was aware of: one across the street [...]]]>

We love you, Big Daddy: our arrival at Ponderosa Steakhouse in Amsterdam, NY

Last night I did something that my friend Ed and I had been discussing on and off for some time: I recreated an enduring memory from my childhood and made the trek to Ponderosa Steakhouse.

Growing up in the Capital District, there were at least two that I was aware of: one across the street from Crossgates, and the one my family frequented in East Greenbush. I always looked forward to the trips, especially since for us they were few and far between.

In the last decade or so, the Ponderosa locations throughout the Capital Region disappeared. I had always assumed that the company had gone out of business, until a little over a year ago when Ed informed me that one still existed in Amsterdam, NY. After someone – I don’t remember who – made mention of it on Twitter, I snagged the opportunity to rope some others into the great, impossible dream Ed and I had clung onto for so long.

Attending were Hellions of Troy roller derby competitor and Times Union blogger Marcie Pry (alias “Short Temper”), local blogger Leigh Cummings, and local local (the aforementioned) Ed Lass. The four of us met in Albany’s Center Square neighborhood, piled into Ed’s car, and embarked on a forty-five minute drive to Amsterdam, New York, though it might be more appropriate to say that we went North on the Thruway and took the exit for our childhood.

We pulled into the parking lot and were pleasantly surprised to see that the lot was not only full, but featured a large ceramic bull in front that had been christened “Big Daddy.” Closer inspection revealed what I had initially suspected but dismissed out of notions of taste and common sense: the ceramic bull, which heralded your arrival at the family-friend buffet and steakhouse, was anatomically correct. What makes this more amazing is the idea that there was most probably a discussion that occurred as to whether or not the bull should be anatomically correct, and after this discussion it was decided that it would be best to err on the side of accuracy.

Marcie (left) and Leigh show Big Daddy some love.

After taking several pictures with the bull and marveling at its genitals , we went inside. One of the more exciting aspects of the trip was the knowledge that we had to place our order before we sat down, but after looking at the menu we realized something was amiss. The food was still relatively cheap, but some items seemed like they should be cheaper than others and vice-versa. Specifically, ordering an enhancement on an item actually made it cheaper.

We asked the manager, who walked over to the board and sighed.

“These kids,” he said. “You see what they keep doing to me?”

He then spent several minutes trying to locate the correct items and match them up with the correct prices. All four of us assisted, doing our best to guess what went where based on logistics and where numbers seemed like they would fit. What would be an irritant to others instead served as an amazing introduction to the place. It was almost like playing a showcase on “The Price is Right.”

“Oh, these kids,” the manager repeated ad nauseum.

We paid for our meal. All four of us kept it simple: we got the buffet. I walked through the restaurant and did some people-watching, and noticed that we were the only group in the entire restaurant that didn’t have small children with them. This didn’t escape the attention of the manager.

“You all from around here?” he asked.

“Albany,” Leigh responded. Her and Ed began chatting with the manager when I rudely and briskly interrupted them.

“Speak for yourself,” I said indignantly. “I’m from Troy.”

Leigh loved the food, and classed things up with a rose in her hair.

After some further conversation with the manager, we took our seats and engaged the buffet. Needless to say, I wasn’t expecting much, but I was still pleasantly surprised. I expected the kid-friendly food to be borderline intolerable, but it was actually quite pleasant. Not being a foodie, I won’t go into details, Leigh has a full review on her blog if you’re curious, and indeed, the cobbler was awesome.

Each of us had two full plates of food, which considering Marcie’s petite build was an impressive feat. I had worried about appearing like a glutton, but I suspect she could have eaten all of us under the table and did us a favor by not emasculating us with another trip after dessert.

We left and encountered various vending machines for toys and trinkets, as well as a prize crane featuring baseball caps. I spent two dollars trying to win the John Deer and the Dale Earnhardt, Jr. mesh caps, but to no avail. Ed was able to successfully retrieve a Philadelphia Eagles cap, which I opted not to go for out of the love and respect I hold for all God’s creatures. I then spent fifty cents on some Marvel comics stickers, which will absolutely go on the cover of my Macbook.

Goodbye, Big Daddy. Until next time.

When I got home, I slipped into a pair of sweats and reflected on the meal and the memories it brought forth. Nostalgia often betrays us. Things that we loved usually don’t hold up, owing both to the context of time and the reduced expectations of childhood. In an adult world that is wrought with disappointments and unmet expectations, I’m happy to say that Ponderosa is not one of them.

After reflecting, I set up my laptop to play the day’s podcasts from NPR and faded into a food coma that I did not awaken from until early this morning. I did not remember my dreams from that deep and comfortable sleep, though I am sure they included the wonderful memories that were re-awoken and nightmares of those damn kids re-arranging the menu magnets again.

LINKS

• Leigh’s blog – The Ballad of Big Daddy, the Anatomically Correct Bull
• Amsterdam Ponderosa website
• Like “Amsterdam Ponderosa” on Facebook
• Follow us on Twitter: Kevin Marshall | Ed Lass | Leigh Cummings | Marcie Pry

—–

Albany, you confound me.

At times, you act like you have inferiority issues. You treat Obama’s visit to announce an inconsequential PR “committee” to create jobs as if he’s moving the Capitol to Firstly, a big high-five to the other folks in the are who had today off because of our winter Hellstorm.

NXIVM founder Keith Rainere, aka "Vanguard," who clearly hasn't developed a Christ complex or anything. (photo: Patrick Dodson, Albany Student Press)

At times, you act like you have inferiority issues. You treat Obama’s visit to announce an inconsequential PR “committee” to create jobs as if he’s moving the Capitol to Schenectady. Parts of Lark Street and the Center Square neighborhood have so much Williamsburgh envy it’s embarrassing. You even get movies to shoot here on the precipice that parts of Albany kinda look like New York City.

Yet there are things that we can lay claim to that very few areas in this country can. We’re the capital of New York State. Our region boasts no shortage of things to do and great places to eat. The music scene is exploding. The mayor of Albany itself has a darker tan base than any other mayor in the world, including those municipalities that rest on the Equator.

I could go on and on, but there’s one thing that sets us apart and makes us special…

We have our own…well, some people allege it maintains a certain unfavorable status in the community.

The group is called NXIVM and its founder, Keith Rainere – who is known to walk amongst members in a robe and whose followers refer to him as Vanguard – boasts self-improvement through droning business jargon, amateur psychoanalysis, and pseudo science.

The latest round of news hit the Times Union in Sunday’s print edition, which reveals more of the…well, utter strangeness behind the organization.

Check out the article here.

The reporter, James M. Odato, has done other pieces on the “self-improvement organization” that have brought forth questions as to the legitimacy of its claims, its practices, and what it really gives its followers.

Here’s more reading on the organization to get you through your snow day:

• Ex-NXIVM trainer: Students are Prey – A former trainer and one of Rainere’s ex-girlfriends gave sworn testimony claiming that Rainere’s and his organizations motives are not quite as philanthropic as they seem.
• NXIVM Sues Former Officer – The organization filed a lawsuit against one of its former members, who also happens to be Rainere’s ex.
• NXIVM Seeks Gag Order - Another former NXIVM member, this time an Executive Board member, was sued when she spoke publicly about the organization. Months earlier she’d sought protection from the onslaught of legal filings against her from the organization.
• Ex-NXIVM Student: I Think It’s a Cult (with video) – A former student talks of her time in the organization, and how she thinks she narrowly escaped an all-encompassing, manipulative cult.
• Secret Mission: a Child – In July 2010, it was discovered that NXIVM had made a child one of Rainere’s projects, having Nannies come in and only speak to the child in foreign languages and engaging in other experiments that are part of a NXIVM program called “The Rainbow Cultural Garden.”
• Dalai Lama Cancels his Visit to Albany - In November 2009, the Dalai Lama cancelled a planned visit to the Capital Region due to controversy that erupted due to the talk’s sponsor, NXIVM. The bad publicity prompted NXIVM to sue Metroland, the first of many legal attacks against opponents and critics.