Kevin Marshall's America » News / Current Events http://www.kevinmarshallonline.com/blog Musing & misadventures of a writer, comedian, and local treasure Thu, 13 Nov 2014 00:17:24 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.0.38 Occupy the Voting Booth http://www.kevinmarshallonline.com/blog/2011/11/08/occupy-the-voting-booth/ http://www.kevinmarshallonline.com/blog/2011/11/08/occupy-the-voting-booth/#comments Tue, 08 Nov 2011 19:48:52 +0000 http://www.kevinmarshallonline.com/blog/?p=6487 There’s an Occupy movement that all of you, particularly those who identify as “the 99%”, should partake in:

It’s called Election Day, and it’s happening right now.

If you’ve been engaged in any of the campouts across the nation, whether it be in front of a bronze bull or under a tree in Academy Park [...]]]> There’s an Occupy movement that all of you, particularly those who identify as “the 99%”, should partake in:

It’s called Election Day, and it’s happening right now.

If you’ve been engaged in any of the campouts across the nation, whether it be in front of a bronze bull or under a tree in Academy Park in dowtown Albany, then you owe it to yourself and your beliefs to be at your local polling place today. Because you can occupy whatever you want for however long you like, but if you’re not where you need to be when it matters, then what’s the damn point?

Make all the excuses you want – it’s an off year, there aren’t any federal elections, our gripe isn’t with our Mayors, these elections don’t matter. It’s all bunk. Democracy begins in your back yard. If you can’t be bothered to have a voice and take part in the most important elections – the ones that most directly affect your day to day life – then your quarrel should be with internal factors in addition to the 1%. Occupy the voting booth.

 

]]> http://www.kevinmarshallonline.com/blog/2011/11/08/occupy-the-voting-booth/feed/ 5 Why I Love “Man of a Certain Age”, Reason #3,468 http://www.kevinmarshallonline.com/blog/2010/03/28/why-i-love-man-of-a-certain-age-reason-3468/ http://www.kevinmarshallonline.com/blog/2010/03/28/why-i-love-man-of-a-certain-age-reason-3468/#comments Sun, 28 Mar 2010 20:59:20 +0000 http://blog.timesunion.com/marshall/?p=190 Because he actually got a post about vibrators, complete with images, onto a Hearst Corporation website. This continues the trend this weekend of people on our blogs dedicating entire articles to controversies surrounding inanimate plastic objects that are ultimately just tools for people to grant themselves some form of satisfaction and personal pleasure.

And some [...]]]>

He's not a loner, Dottie, but he sure is a rebel

Because he actually got a post about vibrators, complete with images, onto a Hearst Corporation website. This continues the trend this weekend of people on our blogs dedicating entire articles to controversies surrounding inanimate plastic objects that are ultimately just tools for people to grant themselves some form of satisfaction and personal pleasure.

And some of you say we’re sell-outs. We’re still on here, doing our thing and sticking it to the man with things that women stick to—okay, I’ll stop.

]]> http://www.kevinmarshallonline.com/blog/2010/03/28/why-i-love-man-of-a-certain-age-reason-3468/feed/ 5 Present Tense After Dark: How to Talk to Women the Steven Raucci Way http://www.kevinmarshallonline.com/blog/2010/03/25/present-tense-after-dar-how-to-talk-to-women-the-steven-raucci-way/ http://www.kevinmarshallonline.com/blog/2010/03/25/present-tense-after-dar-how-to-talk-to-women-the-steven-raucci-way/#comments Thu, 25 Mar 2010 20:01:31 +0000 http://blog.timesunion.com/marshall/?p=155 It’s Wednesday night, and it’s getting late. You know what that means. As day gives way to night, it’s time for In tPresent Tense After Dark. This one’s just for the ladies. So fellas, hit the bricks. Go tell Mark McGuire what you think of the new NFL play-off overtime rules. Me and [...]]]> It’s Wednesday night, and it’s getting late. You know what that means. As day gives way to night, it’s time for In tPresent Tense After Dark. This one’s just for the ladies. So fellas, hit the bricks. Go tell Mark McGuire what you think of the new NFL play-off overtime rules. Me and the ladies, we gotta talk some news.

Some sexy news.

This week’s sexy newsmaker: Smooth-Talkin’ Steven Raucci.

Awwwwwwwww yeah. (TU photo)

Now here’s a man who doesn’t mince words. He knows how to talk to you ladies. So I visited him in jail earlier this week, and he gave me some sage advice. So I’ve taken his guidelines for the workplace and adopted them for this blog.

Pay attention, ladies, because I’m only gonna say this once…in a deep baritone voice.

(Please click to listen to sexy saxophone music while reading the following guidelines for being a reader of Kevin Marshall: In the Present Tense)

TO: Lady Readers
FROM: Kevin Marshall, TimesUnion.com Blogger
RE: ‘sup Ladies?
DATE: March 24th, 2010

Why hello there. I am pleased to inform you that you have been accepted for a position…as a reader of this blog.

Additional conditions for reading this blog are as follows:

  • Be sure your blogger is always happy
  • Take time every day to keep your appearance pleasing for your blogger.
  • Be attentive to your blogger’s needs and wants during the blog post.
  • Always keep your hair at its present length or as closely as possible.
  • Talk to your blogger as often as needed for him to feel comfortable.
  • Always remember that your blogger is a man first and a blogger second and he should be treated as such in that sequence.
  • Being attractive, sensitive, and classy with a touch of sexiness, are crucial to the position
  • If you are married or living with a significant other, it must be understood that during the hours of 7am-3:30pm you are there for your blogger.
  • Always express your feelings on anything that does not set well with you both in the office and out.
  • Your health, physical condition must always be your top priorities.
  • NEVER forget that you were chosen to read this blog because you met all the above criteria.

Got it, ladies? Good. That’s what living In the Present Tense is all about.

And Steve-O: thanks again for the tips, player. You are, indeed, one smooth mamma-jamma.

]]> http://www.kevinmarshallonline.com/blog/2010/03/25/present-tense-after-dar-how-to-talk-to-women-the-steven-raucci-way/feed/ 7 The Deep Divide in the 20th & Why I Won’t Talk Politics; Present Tense Gets International Coverage http://www.kevinmarshallonline.com/blog/2010/03/18/the-deep-divide-in-the-20th-present-tense-gets-international-coverage/ http://www.kevinmarshallonline.com/blog/2010/03/18/the-deep-divide-in-the-20th-present-tense-gets-international-coverage/#comments Thu, 18 Mar 2010 12:37:51 +0000 http://blog.timesunion.com/marshall/?p=59 As I was engaging in my traditional civic duty of cruising the Times Union website in a half-hearted attempt to keep my finger on the pulse of our region, I came across a photograph in Jimmy Vielkind’s story on the deep divide on health care in the 20th Congressional District that reminded me why [...]]]> As I was engaging in my traditional civic duty of cruising the Times Union website in a half-hearted attempt to keep my finger on the pulse of our region, I came across a photograph in Jimmy Vielkind’s story on the deep divide on health care in the 20th Congressional District that reminded me why I rarely talk politics and probably won’t on this blog:

For so many in this country, a picture like this is gratifying or exciting. Me, it’s just a reminder of how incredibly childish and illogical people can get when it comes to politics. It’s one thing to be passionate. It’s another thing to be so smug and self-assured as to close your mind off to any potential opposition to your views, or adopt the philosophy that a louder voice and angrier gesture will win any debate or argument.

Is it unfair that I’m casting judgement on the individuals shown in this picture? I’m sure. It’s also wholly unfair to paint them and their views in such broad strokes based on a single image. But as the cliche goes, a picture’s worth a thousand words. These are the words the picture conveys to myself and others.

I know I’m beating a dead horse when I say that this type of discourse is nothing but harmful to our country and the cause of reform (regardless of which side of the fence you reside). I just wanted to make it clear that I’m not doing it because I’m ignorant, apathetic, or uncaring. Certainly, I am, but also because I have no desire to act a fool in a public setting unless I’m at least going to get some laughs out of it.

————-

As a result of this very blog, Marshallmania is running wild throughout the country…and in others, as well! My recent post regarding handshakes drew the attention of Canadian film buff, festival organizer, professional wrestling personality, and blogger Michael “Llakor” Ryan. It prompted him to explore the ritual of the handshake as it applies to the delicate and sometimes strange world of professional wrestling.Oh, Canada!

Michael makes a note about old media “hitching a ride” and the fact that I write gratis for the Times Union, but also correctly touches on why I think I get more than a fair shake out of the deal. But that’s a blog post for another time.

I’m pretty sure this makes me the first Times Union blogger to gain a foothold internationally.

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