“In 2010 when I was deployed to Iraq, I had to lie about who I was because I’m a gay soldier and I didn’t want to lose my [...]]]> A small controversy erupted at the Fox News/Google GOP debate in Florida last week when a now openly gay soldier submitted a YouTube question to the panel.

“In 2010 when I was deployed to Iraq, I had to lie about who I was because I’m a gay soldier and I didn’t want to lose my job. My question is, under one of your Presidencies, do you intend to circumvent the progress that’s been made for gay and lesbian soldiers in the military?”

This was, notoriously, followed by a small portion of the live audience booing loudly with no small amount of derision and hostility.

What was more disconcerting to me, though, was Santorum’s response. Firstly, he did not acknowledge those very loud boos for an American soldier and did not chastise that very vocal group for their treatment of the man and his question, which for anyone with any semblance of decency should have been first and foremost on their agenda.

Instead, he began with this:

“I would say that any kind of sexual activity has no place in the military and the fact that they’re making it a point to include it as a provision and that we’re going to recognize a group of people and give them a special privilege to-and-deh-in removing Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.”

The video, a little over two minutes in length, is below.

Okay, let’s back up.

Firstly, “any kind of sexual activity has no place in the military.” What exactly does this statement mean? What he wants to say is that sexual orientation has no place in the military. However, Santorum’s pathological bias against homosexuals can’t be hidden. He’s a guy that wears his feelings, and his insecurities, on his sleeve. Homosexuals are deviants. And they are a verb, not a noun, and that verb is a vile act.

The repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” provides soldiers with the ability to acknowledge that they are gay, particularly if they are confronted with it, without fear of retribution from superiors and peers in the military. Rick Santorum, however, seems to think that it means that not only will gay soldiers go around yelling about how gay they are all the damn time, but they’ll follow it up with “and now we will have butt sex in front of EVERYONE.”

I jest, but his phrasing is important because it betrays a very outdated and somewhat warped sense of what being a homosexual is: it’s not an orientation or who you are, but rather a fetish akin to someone who smells shoes or sucks toes. So for me, I wasn’t bothered by the booing, because it really was a small handful of cranks that were quickly shushed, and there were just as many others (if not more) in the audience  that applauded the soldier for his question and his bravery. What I was and continue to be bothered and deeply concerned by is not only Santorum’s nervous, blustery bigotry, but the undue sensitivity granted to him and his archaic world view by pundits and the general public. The mainstream media took a small handful of anonymous, boorish crowd members to task, but not the Presidential hopeful who champions the rhetoric.

Rick Santorum complained last week about the search engine Google and how it wasn’t doing anything to eliminate the horrible and offensive search results that come up when you enter his name as a query. I was curious, so I entered his name myself. The second entry is to his Wikipedia page, but the first entry was to Spreading Santorum, a site that lists the new definition of “Santorum” provided by a reader of gay columnist Dan Savage in response to Santorum’s description of pedophilia in priests as a “homosexual relationship.” I felt and do feel for him, and honestly wish Savage had never done it. It’s imbecilic and childish, and only lends the man the appearance of being a victim himself.

It also distracts from what I assumed he meant when he complained about offensive search results: all the terrible things he’s said and believes about gay people.

Well…kind of.

Actually, Donald Trump doesn’t want to be President. Donald Trump [...]]]>

Image via Wikipedia

Entertainment headlines the last several weeks have been dominated by Donald Trump’s speculated Presidential bid. Trump has been everything from a bankrupt billionaire to a morally bankrupt reality television show host, and now he wants to be your next President of the United States.

Well…kind of.

Actually, Donald Trump doesn’t want to be President. Donald Trump isn’t the man who spoke before the CPAC Conference recently and was heckled by the Tea Party portion of the crowd. Donald Trump isn’t the guy who’s been making the rounds talking up his potential Presidential bid and suggesting he may run as an Independent instead of as a Republican. Donald Trump isn’t the one saying he doesn’t believe Obama was born in the United States (even though he totally was). Donald Trump didn’t recently call Bush the “worst President in history,” further polarizing himself amongst other GOP Presidential hopefuls.

That was television character The Donald.

We’re coming out of a decade where reality television dominated the landscape. Fortunately (for us), that era is coming to an end. The popularity of these shows is no longer guaranteed; slumping ratings for key shows and the embarrassingly low attendance at the recent Reality Rocks! Expo in Los Angeles are further proof that television is trending away from cheap voyeur programming. However, despite the sharp decline in popularity, it has left in its wake a permanent legacy: people knowingly portraying caricatures of themselves for the sake of entertainment or, more often, self-promotion.

The Donald from New York, like The Situation from the Jersey Shore, isn’t the same guy in front of a camera that he would be if you were to meet him in private. It’s a version of the real person with the volume turned up, along with a handful of personality traits created during the course of a television series. Although he made a name for himself initially in Real Estate, Trump has co-opted a method perfected by a new type of celebrity that is famous simply for being famous rather than any particular talent.

It’s not just his portrayal of The Donald  persona in public appearances that has me skeptical of a Presidential run. It’s also the timing. Talk of his running started in early March, the same time NBC was premiering the latest season of “Celebrity Apprentice.” Now he’s stated he’ll make his official decision in June…after the conclusion of the current season and the announcement of next season’s contestants.

In the meantime, the speculation will continue and more questions will be asked by everyone from Wolf Blitzer in his ominous Situation Room (which sadly is not located anywhere near the Jersey Shore) to Mario Lopez on the set of “Access Hollywood.” Will he run as a Republican or an Independent? Will he “Ross Perot” the GOP ticket, a reference to the theory that Clinton’s 1992 victory was the direct result of a split created amongst Conservatives by Perot’s candidacy? If so, is he really a Democratic plant  (I could have sworn during the 90s he even publicly identified himself as such)? Will he continue to surge in the polls?

No, because The Donald will tell us in June that he’s decided not to run. He will call politics a nasty business and infer that personal attacks against his character have come in conflict with his duties as a businessman. He’ll also note that he ultimately decided his life’s work as a businessman and media mogul was more important. Then he’ll wrap up by alluding to a conspiracy to force him out of the race.

The real reason, however, will be that The Donald can’t run because he – not Obama – isn’t a citizen of the United States. You have to be a real person to meet that criteria.