This Saturday, the UFC’s doing something unique: an all-heavyweight card. Some injuries have occurred, naturally, that changed it up a bit and may have prevented this from being the supercard the UFC envisioned, but it still promises to be an entertaining evening of slobberknockers.

Gonzaga was literally on this card just long enough to get on the poster and fuck it all up.

UFC 146: FAT GUYS THAT HIT HARD!* 

• Junior dos Santos (c) vs. Frank Mir for the UFC Heavyweight Championship
  Frank Mir steps in for Alistair Overeem, who ate too much damn horsemeat and popped a 14:1 T/E ratio for a surprise drug test that actually shouldn’t have been a surprise given they told him in advance to be prepared to be tested out of competition (, you buffoon). Frank Mir was the first and most logical choice. People seem to think he has no chance, but the story of Frank Mir is littered with situations where fans and fighters underestimated him at their peril. Personally, I was in the camp that thought after that motorcycle accident that he was done being an elite fighter, and yet here we are eight years later and he’s still a contender and legit top five in his division. Still, I think Dos Santos is too quick, hits too hard, and is too wily for Mir.
  PICK: Junior Dos Santos via R1 KO
• Cain Velasquez vs.  Antonio Silva
  This fight was created out necessity because of the Overeem debacle. Cain was Mir’s original opponent, and Silva was scheduled to face Roy Nelson. I think both would have been more intriguing match-ups, though I think this one is going to be a tougher fight for Velasquez than people think. MMA is a very “what have you done for me lately” sport, and as such, the most recent impression people have of Antonio “Big Foot” Silva was his poor display against Cormier last September. However, that fight should come with the disclaimer that Silva is much better than he showed that night and Cormier, then and still to an extent now, is the most underrated fighter in the game. That said, I’m still going with Velasquez, who’s stronger and has a deeper toolbox than Bigfoot. I think he got caught by Dos Santos in the same way every guy eventually does, and I’m convinced a title rematch would have a different outcome. I think we’ll see that happen with a decisive win here.
  PICK: Cain Velasquez via Unanimous Decision
• Heavyweight bout: Roy Nelson vs. Dave Herman
  Nelson has become a gatekeeper for the division, which some people expected as soon as he was signed by the UFC and won the all-heavyweight season of “The Ultimate Fighter.” As a guy who looks at MMA as more sport than entertainment, Nelson frustrates me because he often trains and fights with the entertainment aspect in mind, and it costs him dearly whenever he has to face a top 5 fighter. Herman has far less experience than Nelson at the upper echelon of MMA, but he’s a wickedly dangerous slugger that can and I think will draw Nelson into the same old bad habits that have cost him in three of his last four fights.
  PICK: Dave Herman via KO R3
• Heavyweight bout: Stipe Miočić vs. Shane del Rosario
  This fight is getting the least attention out of any on the main card, but in my mind it’s the most interesting. Both guys are undefeated against decent competition and have a strong all-around pedigree: Miočić is a fierce striker with a legit collegiate wrestling background and del Rosario is a Muay Thai champion with dangerous Jiu-Jitsu. This one’s as close to a push as you’ll get on this card. I’m going (hesitantly) with del Rosario, though Miočić can pull it off if he can manage to avoid del Rosario’s onslaught and effectively utilize his wrestling.
  PICK: Shane del Rosario via R2 TKO
• Heavyweight bout: Stefan Struve vs. Lavar Johnson
  Johnson is the type of fighter that is Struve’s kryptonite: an aggressive heavy-hitter who won’t give him room to recover. Struve has skills and a freakish reach, but he’s also a slow starter with a habit of taking bad beatings before he gets going. I’m going with the upset on this one.
  PICK: Lavar Johnson by R1 KO. 

PRELIMINARY BOUTS

• Featherweight bout:  Mike Brown vs.  Daniel Pineda
• Light Heavyweight bout:  Kyle Kingsbury vs.  Glover Teixeira
• Lightweight bout:  Jacob Volkmann vs.  Paul Sass
  I’m hoping for a knockout win for Sass, just so we don’t have to hear Volkmann’s painfully unfunny dumbass “jokes” afterwards.

LIVE ON FX

• Welterweight bout:  Dan Hardy vs.  Duane Ludwig
• Middleweight bout:  Jason Miller vs.  C.B. Dollaway
  Jason Miller has said that if he can’t win this fight he probably doesn’t belong in the UFC. He’s right, and if that does happen I think Dana White et al will agree.
• Lightweight bout:  Edson Barboza vs.  Jamie Varner
• Featherweight bout:  Diego Brandao vs.  Darren Elkins

* not the actual title of this show

*****

Tom Lawlor’s entrances
Last Saturday, Lawlor fought in the last Facebook prelim against Middleweight phenom Chris Weidman. He lost (Weidman is on a tear and I expect him to be in a position for a title shot by the end of 2012), but he won our hearts with his latest entrance. Even better, though, was his turn at the weigh-ins where he showed up dressed as Steven Seagal:

*****

Chael Sonnen’s mental illness

Sonnen  is an incredible creep, highly unlikable, a liar, a cheater, brash, and irritating. Thankfully, though, he’s also batshit crazy. This makes him at least entertaining, even when he’s being intolerable.

*****

More “free” MMA than ever before
With UFC on Fox now behind us, we’re set to see more specials on Fox, Fuel, and FX in the next few months. As a bonus, they’ve learned their lesson from JDS/Cain, and Fox Network specials will have a minimum of two fights. It’s little consolation for those who decided to forego the Facebook prelims or didn’t know about them and missed a fantastic display from Benson Henderson and Clay Guida.

*****

Too much MMA
One of the things MMA fans have complained about over the past year – and I’m certainly one of them – is burnout. At certain times the UFC has operated at a blistering pace, putting on as many as six events in as many weeks. Add that to the weekly (and fantastic) Bellator cards and it becomes a bit too much to take. But let’s put this in perspective: remember when we’d get a UFC once every six to eight weeks? Not only was the wait killing us, but if you’re like me and had the occasional obligation on a Saturday night and missed a card, you had to wait another month or two before you got to see a decent fight again. In that sense, maybe too much MMA isn’t such a bad thing after all.

More Fight of the Year Candidates in the next five weeks (or would be if Shogun and Henderson hadn’t fought last Saturday)
UFC 140 is just two weeks away – I know – and features Mark Hominick taking on the Korean Zombie, Chan Sung Jung, on the undercard. As star-studded as the card as a whole is – it’s a triple bill featuring Jon Jones vs. Lyoto Machida, Frank Mir vs. Antonio Minotauro Nogueira, and Tito Ortiz vs. Antonio Rogerio Nogueira – Hominick and the Zombie are all but guaranteed to steal the show. Then, just a few weeks later, we get Brock Lesnar taking on Alistair Overeem in the main event of UFC 141 and in the semi-main event a fight featuring two of the most aggressive Lightweights in the world, Donald Cerrone and Nate Diaz. And a lot of people seem to be sleeping on the main event of The Ultimate Fighter 14 Finale between coaches Michael Bisping and Jason “Mayhem” Miller, which I think is going to surprise a lot of people with its intensity. It could be a thoroughly competitive, entertaining affair. Well, so long as Bisping doesn’t stick his chin out and skip in a straight circle like an idiot.

*****

Am I missing something? Probably. But clearly, there’s a lot to be thankful for and a lot to look forward to in the weeks, months, and years to come. So when you’re at your table tomorrow and your elderly grandmother asks you to lead the family in saying grace, take the hands of those next to you and tell everyone that you’re thankful to God and everyone else for the Minotauro brothers, the Korean Zombie, horse meat, and Mayhem.

Amen.