Kevin Marshall's America
George W. to Future Facebook Friends: “…Bring it On!”
Ladies and gentlemen, former President George W. Bush has joined Facebook.
Just what I need, another jerk bugging me to help him out on Farmville. Well listen, Dubs, I’m no socialist. This is America! You pull yourself up by your bootstraps just like everyone else and get your own chickens!
Since he’s a newbie to Facebook, I do want to give him some helpful advice.
- DO NOT FRIEND PEOPLE YOU ONLY KNOW FROM PLAYING MAFIA WARS. They will harass your friends in turn and then you’ll look like a jerk. Dick Cheney will be all “who the Hell is Carl Paladino and why does he keep bugging me to join his mob? George…GEORGE!” Speaking of which…
- DO NOT LIST “TEABAGGING” UNDER INTERESTS. Just say “Tea Party Movement” and leave it at that. Trust me on this.
- HIDE SARAH PALIN’S UPDATES. Otherwise she’ll drive you crazy with a barrage of nonsensical rambling status updates wrought with spelling errors and making clumsy allusions to her High School basketball days.
- CAREFUL WHO YOU LET TAG YOU IN PICTURES! You might write “ha ha good timse” in the comments section, but a future employer might think otherwise.
- ONCE YOUR MOM AND DAD JOIN, THE PARTY’S OVER. And parents on Facebook read everything, dude, it’s ridiculous. Be careful what you put out there!
Has anyone friended him yet?
Note: Don’t fret, loyal state workers and readers from Belgium and Turkey (seriously)! This week’s BLOGORAMA is scheduled to post later today.
6 Responses to George W. to Future Facebook Friends: “…Bring it On!”
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You know, I believe it takes all kinds to make the world go round and I want to be friends with as may kinds as possible but I will not be friends with W on facebook or in person. This coming from somone who just added in no particular order her boyfriends sister because she asked, a gay porn star, a pre-op trans-gender, random guy from a party who was fun, my arch nemesis from high-school, and two of my moms cousins.
George W does not get a friend request from me.
Are your readers in Belgium and Turkey Belgian and Turkish? Because they would have to be pretty hip to get the CapDist (and, yes, it was, and forever shall remain, the Capital District, not Region…I don’t care what my stance costs me) references. Hats off to your global reach, dude.
Thanks, Gman! Appreciate your readership and especially your feedback. You’re tops in my book.
From what I can tell the internationals are mostly hitting the regionally neutral posts I write (eg. the “People of Wal-Mart” post, the stuff from dating week, my diatribe on SatC 2, etcetera).
I suspect though, as is the case with most of the hits I see coming in west of the Mississippi, that it might be transplants from the area.
Love it.
hahaha…great blog. i wanna be friends with GW!
See Davelyn… now I have another reason for not joining facebook.