Kevin Marshall's America
Hey, know those “A Reader Asks” blogs that some of the folks here at the TU do (Kristi, Amanda, maybe others)? Well, I’m gonna do the same. Because why not?
Except I’m going to call mine A Reader Has This Question And I’m Like Hey I Might Be Able to Answer That (ARHTQAILHIMBATAT).
“HopeFul” asks:
1. Ok, if you had to hire a professional baseball pitching coach for a 20 year old, who would you hire? This is pretty serious.
2. If your 23 year old tried periodically to repay his grandparents the money they lent him for college, etc. (couple grand), and they kept refusing it…what would you do? Here you are as a parent trying to teach your kid the importance of repaying debts and appreciating their kindness and the damn grandparents screw it up! It’s not the money – it’s the lesson.
So, answers, Mr. Marshall?
Hey, I might be able to answer that!
What do you guys think? My responses after the jump.
Greg Maddux: your kid's pitching coach?
1. With unlimited resources? Greg Maddux. He was easily one of the greatest pitchers of the 1990s, retained his form through most of the ’00s, and is the smartest pitcher in the history of baseball. He didn’t have much power, but it didn’t matter. And that’s why you want him as a coach: he didn’t just throw, he knew what to pitch and when. Problem is, he’d cost a lot of money and I have no idea if he’s even a pitcher! So really I’m of no help here. Hopefully a reader will be.
2. Money and family is often a volatile mixture. Most of the time the problem is the inverse of yours, and it creates a lot of tension that breaks up families…sometimes permanently.
…before we continue, let me go on a premature rant. Somebody will invariably read this and respond with “you obviously don’t have children.” Really? So that means my opinion is less valid no matter? So, say somebody says “I’m going to light my baby on fire” and I say “hey wait, I don’t think that’s a good idea” are you going to pop up and say “obviously you don’t have children”? Yeah, didn’t think so. Stop saying that sort of crap.
Here’s the thing: your kid? You done good with him. You said yourself that he keeps trying to repay the debt. He’s willing to do what you perceive to be the right thing. So what exactly is the problem? Perhaps his grandparents are being a little too generous and forgiving for your liking, but you said it yourself: the lesson is the important thing. He didn’t expect to be given a pass, but he was.
It’d be one thing to say this could lead to a learned behavior and him expecting it to happen every time out, but he’s 23-years-old. He’s either learned it by now or he hasn’t, and he’s going to know the difference between his grandparents and a loan shark nicknamed The Barber (Vin I swear to GOD I will have your money next Tuesday).
Besides, he’s an adult now. Your job as a parent, for better or for worse, is pretty much done.
Readers?
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14 Responses to Filler Friday: Like I’m Qualified to Give Advice
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STALK ME
OBVIOUSLY YOU DON’T HAVE CHILDREN!!!!
OBVIOUSLY YOU DON’T HAVE A BLOG!!!!!
(wait, you do, nevermind)
I do have a blog, it is just read by, roughly, 5 people.
You could say it’s an elitest blog.
Or I just suck. One or the other.
Dear Kevin Marshall:
I can’t decide which is better…Crunch-n-Munch, Fiddle Faddle or Poppycock. The research is driving me insane and making me fat(ter).
Please help!
-GenWar
P.S. Obviously, you don’t have children…Sometimes lighting a baby on fire is just good parenting.
I was laughing so hard, co-workers looked at me more stangely than usual.
Ok, lets get back to the point….Kevin has no children.
You do so have children. In fact, you have many children. You just don’t pay their child support.
I can only weigh in on the second question. You buy the person a gift. Some thing as little as a thank you card, dinner or even buy them a weekend at a B&B. It’s a way of acknowledging the generous gift without flat out returning it.
I’ve recently come across your blog (not sure what took me so long)…between your disliking Billy Joel and now your premature rant, you now have a new loyal reader. :) But you forgot to add to your rant the usual closing phrase people love to say: “Just wait until YOU have kids!” Don’t get me started on that…
Tell the kid that I will accept his money, and thank him profusely. That’ll teach him a lesson.
I can see that you are completely flummoxed by these questions, well-meaning though you may be, Mr. Marshall. Let the Big G display the wisdom of Solomon for you:
1. If your kid is 20, and has any hope in hell of really needing a professional pitching coach, guess what? The MLB organization that drafted him will already be paying the freight! Or, he will be getting plenty of top-quality instruction at whatever college program he is currently starring for, and will, within a year or two, be receiving coaching from aforementioned MLB organization. Otherwise, you would be wasting your money on a “professional pitching coach.” So what do you do with the money?
2. You hire Greg Maddux to take the 23-year-old’s grandparents out to a MLB ball game in a swank luxury box to pay them back for all they have done (If the 20-year old and the 23-year old are not related, no matter. Do something nice for them and it will come back to you).
Coming soon…the first verse of “Take Me Out to the Ballgame” in German.
Of course any quality parent would want to hire John Rocker as the pitching coach for their little sticky. http://sun.menloschool.org/~sportman/ethnic/individual/rocker/index.html
@GenWar Poppycock. Hands down.
Tim Christman – Did his college pitching at Siena and then played
for the Colorado Rockies. He did and may still do, private pitch
coaching in the Albany area. He has a phenomenal arm!!
http://www.ualbanysports.com/ViewArticle.dbml?SPSID=70267&SPID=7996&DB_OEM_ID=15800&ATCLID=857903&Q_SEASON=2007
Hopeful – since these childless men have been absolutley no help whatsoever … :) I agree that as long as your older child was prepared and offerred numerous times to repay the loan, you did your job.. My only other suggestion would be talk to the grandparents.. if they really want jr to have the money – suggest they take the money put it into an account- and give it back to him to use as downpayment on a house when the time comes..
As far as pitching coach – Hayners sports barn – first pick would be John Stewart, but he is not available.. go to Hayner’s sports barn website.. and look at tab for staff. Several of their teachers pitched at both AAA level and professionally.
Mr. Marshall: the object of these ARHTQAILHIMBATAT posts is not to answer the question yourself (that’s too much like work) but to allow your readers to answer it. Filler Friday is about not doing any work.
Besides, trying to answer every question puts one on the fast track to being branded an abhorrent show-off.
Tim Christman is one of the teachers at Hayner’s.