Enough Already with the Fake Outrage Over Katy Perry

If the internet has taught us anything, it’s that if a few unsettled reactionaries scream loudly enough, you can pretty much get people to apologize for anything even if no wrong has been committed.

Eyes up, Elmo! Be a gentleman! Is there no one here to set a good example for our children?!

An American institution since its inception over forty years ago, “Sesame Street” has always sought to not only educate and entertain children, but to do so while also incorporating and engaging their parents. To this end they’ve incorporated the use of popular culture references and celebrity appearances that appeal to mothers and fathers, even though it goes over the heads of the children watching.

Unless, of course, a woman and the idea of her breasts might be involved.

When the Children’s Television Workshop posted a video of what was to be Perry’s forthcoming appearance on the show’s 41st season premiere, the outrage was immediate. People felt that the pop star, who in recent years has transitioned from a fairly harmless run-of-the-mill songstress to a copycat provocateur, wore an outfit that the howler monkeys online felt was wildly inappropriate and far too revealing for the children watching at home.

…what?

Perry, as you can see in the photo provided, did wear clothing that showed a bit of cleavage. While I didn’t think much of the outfit myself when I first saw it, apparently it caused would-be pundits and Facebookers to take a break from their obsessive Farmville hobby to declare a fatwah on the Children’s Television Workshop.

If you watch the video, it’s clear that they are playing dress-up. What Perry is wearing is similar to what you see girls as young as 14 wearing in Olympic figure skating. Nothing about the segment had a sexual tone.

And none of that matters, because for many, being angry and righteous is more important than being right.

The other argument, besides the one that disregards a child’s inability to sexualize Perry, regards the content of her songs. Not the song in that specific segment, but the song that she’s adapting for the program. Perry occasionally swears and uses innuendo in her songs, which many argue isn’t fit for exposure to children.

I can recall seeing Paul Simon show up in a chicken outfit on “The Muppet Show.” Yet, strangely, I did not run out and listen to “Graceland.” The reason being, of course, because it was music meant to meet the sensibilities and tastes of an adult (or perhaps more accurate to say more mature) audience.

Did Paul Simon swear in his songs or were they provocative? Well, no, and not really. There’s a difference in content, but not in cultural context. If her music is not appealing to children before her appearance on “Sesame Street” despite her prevalence in popular culture, what will make children turn to her or even be able to acquire some of her more risque work?

The answer is no, they won’t. And if they do, so what?

Secondary or tertiary exposure to an artist won’t make a child like something that isn’t meant for them. Inclusion of operatic pieces such as Wagner’s in “Looney Tunes” shorts certainly entertained children to a degree, but it did not give a child the ability to sit through the entire “Ring” cycle. Children don’t have the capacity to understand the things that their parents are so frightened of are beyond the grasp of their child comprehension. A child may end up discovering the rest of Perry’s work through some effort, and some of it may cause them to ask questions or ask what it means. For the most part, however, they’ll just write it off.

Besides, Katy Perry still exists whether the segment shows up on “Sesame Street” or not.

That’s the real outrage: the pure loss of reason, logic, and perspective in this situation. This idea that Katy Perry’s appearance on “Sesame Street” would result in a sexual awakening in toddlers and expose them to something that would morally degrade them for life would be comical if what it tells us about where we are as a culture wasn’t so depressing. People have become so detached from their real lives and so focused on producing something for other people to read and comment on in their Facebook statuses that they’ve fabricated concerns and nightmare scenarios where they simply do not exist.

Seriously, thank God facebook wasn’t around when George Carlin showed up on “Shining Time Station” as Mr. Conductor, or there’d be hundreds of angry people with digital pitchforks and torches looking to burn down the house. Oddly, despite Carlin’s presence on the show, it took me nearly ten or so years after viewing that program to learn and/or use the words s***, p***, f***, c***, c*********, motherf*****, and t***.

Uh oh, somebody better pretend to get angry and cry to the Times Union, lest their child be exposed to my blog! Wait, your children won’t read my blog or, if they did, they wouldn’t be able to understand what I write about?

Wow, you’re right.

I suppose they won’t get scarred by Katy Perry’s lyrics either, huh?