Christine O’Donnell has released a new ad addressing the concerns raised over statements made during her many, many appearances on Bill Maher’s old “Politically Incorrect” program as well as several other outlets. These include evolution being a myth, asking why monkeys don’t turn into humans, and mice having human brains…the list goes on.

So what does Christine have to say? Well, she’s ready to speak…

…annnnd she completely misses the point.

Does this woman honestly think people stare at her with their mouths agape when she speaks because they think she’s a witch? We know you’re not a witch, my dear, because there’s absolutely no way you’d pass the entrance exam to get in to Hogwart’s in the first place.

I almost feel sorry for her. It’s not entirely her fault. Surely there are friends and loved ones who should be taken to task for encouraging her to run for office.

I know I don’t normally write about politics as often as I have lately, and I’m sorry if you’re turned off by the theme. But you have to understand that we live in extraordinary times: times of anger, magic, Satanic altars, baseball bats, horse-f***ing, and human brains in mice.

God bless America.


Christine O’Donnell is Out of Touch with the Average Chimpanzee (moi)

It’s Not Satanic! Local Witch Skeptical of O’Donnell’s Alleged Date (Daniel Nester)

Two More Takes on O’Donnell’s “Witchcraftery” (Daniel Nester)


15 Responses to Witches and Monkeys and Mice, Oh My!

  1. Emily says:

    I’d respect her more if she was a witch.
    What is this the Wizard of Oz or something?

  2. Tony Barbaro says:

    It’s all fun and games till the Apes take over, led by Satanic Mice with human brains…..
    I think Rosie O’Donnell would get more votes than Christine O’Donell at this point.

  3. Bill says:

    That woman truly scares me. It’s like watching Miss Teen South Carolina… That train wreck that you don’t want to watch or hear, yet you can’t seem to pull away.

    Scary times when people like this not only enter politics, but gain a positive following.

  4. Erin Morelli says:

    Hogwarts doesn’t have an entrance exam – you get accepted based on your potential to do magic. You also have to be 11 years old and live in England/Wales/Scotland area. Either way, she still wouldn’t get in.

  5. No amount of Harry Potter canon failure on Kevin’s fault would even come close to out-epic-failing Christine O’Donnel. It’s like knocking over a mailbox in the middle of seven tornadoes and an earthquake.

  6. Will King says:

    Hold the f*ck up…mice have human brains?!

  7. B.J. Hart says:

    I say, bring back celebrity death matches!

  8. Tony Barbaro says:

    YES, celebrity death match: Paladino vs. O’Donnell
    “I’ll take you out!”
    “But I’m a good witch….”

  9. CRZ says:

    Say, Kevin… are you paying as much attention to the races in which you can actually vote as you are the ones in Delaware?

  10. Eric says:

    Hey Erin, where do Northern Irish wizards & witches attend school? Is their exclusion from Hogwarts an act of English aggression?

  11. Donna H says:

    “We know you’re not a witch, my dear, because there’s absolutely no way you’d pass the entrance exam to get in to Hogwart’s in the first place.” Give yourself a comment award. Great one! Burn!!

    Scary. I’m actually agreeing with Bill O’Riley. You know you’re too stupid to breathe when O’Riley is obviously thinking are you kidding me? And that scientist made a good point. Have the decussion now so guidelines and regulations can be drawn up before someone goes somewhere they really shouldn’t.

    This is frustrating. Stem cells could so be helping me recover my freaking disappearing bones.

  12. Em says:

    I agree with the other Emily. I would also like her more if she was a witch…but that’s only because I’ve never known or heard of a pagan republican. :/

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