Legendary crank and emphatically-challenged essayist Andy Rooney announced yesterday that after over 1,000 segments on the CBS News segment “60 Minutes,” he’s hanging it up.

I’m going to miss Andy. Mostly for the Andy Rooney Game, a brilliant concept created by comedian Joe Mande where you take everything but the first and last sentences out of an Andy Rooney segment. The result: hilarious non-sequitirs and an unintentionally revealing looks into the dark psyche of a tormented old man.

If it seems unfair to Rooney, it’s not as if he doesn’t deserve it. Have you ever seen or read such nuggets as his commentary on Kurt Cobain? To call his approach and views on tragedies and life in general out of date would be far too generous and an insult to antiquity. Age isn’t a factor, either: he was every bit the sharp grump at 92 that he was at 52.

All that aside, he was a true trailblazer and pioneer of a field that has exploded in recent years: people who don’t have very interesting thoughts, no constructive insights, and little in the way of art or intelligence in their souls spewing endless drivel for an audience that is all too eager to get angry and riled up over the mundane so as to distract them from real-world problems and responsibilities.

Basically, without Andy Rooney, the blogosphere wouldn’t exist. So thank you, Andy, for all that you’ve done. And if “60 Minutes” wants a replacement, there’s a link up above that says “Contact.” I’ll work for peanuts. Just ask the Times Union.

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8 Responses to Internet pioneer Andy Rooney retires from 60 Minutes

  1. Dain Brammage says:

    Personally, I think you should work for walnuts. NO! NO! Pistachios, they are expensive

  2. J Eric Smith says:

    On a (semi-)positive, (semi-)serious note, I heard Andy Rooney speak to the Brigade of Midshipmen at Annapolis circa 1985, and he was brilliant . . . he told us about being a young WWII field correspondent, and what it was like flying around in the guts of creaky warplanes while being shot at by massive ground-based artillery . . . and how that shaped the man he was then (and presumably is now) . . . I don’t read or watch him anymore, and haven’t for years and years, but I do respect him. Hats off to you, sir. Well played.

    • Rob Madeo says:

      Eric: My War, Rooney’s memoir about stumbling into journalism in WW II is a great book that’s worth reading. I’d also recommend it to young writers who have trouble composing succinct sentences. Come to think of it, there are quite a few older bloggers who could also learn a lesson about brevity from Mr. Rooney.

      I thought Andy Rooney was funny. Over the years people criticized him in the same way many bloggers I know have been criticized by those who didn’t appreciate their skewed view of the world or like their sense of humor.

      Ever write something that you thought was funny and other people didn’t? His comments on Cobain were wrong, but who among us is right all the time?

      By the way, I do not recall ever receiving any peanuts for my work on the Times Union’s website. It hurts me deeply that you got peanuts and I did not.

      • Rob Madeo says:

        Meant to break the paragraph after the word “didn’t”…oops.

      • Anonymous says:

        Fair enough. If I’m critical of Rooney, it’s only because the last twenty years he’s been doing trite, fairly terrible segments every week. I’ll concede ignorance to his earlier work as a correspondent and memoirs of said work.

  3. Katie says:

    Oh man, I loved Andy Rooney when I was a kid… checked all his books out of the library. Agreed that his WWII stuff is really good. It was one of the first alternative perspectives on war that I got as a kid (maybe alternative is not what I mean… but it was the first thing I read on war that wasn’t just a textbook). I still enjoy his crabby commentaries, but he does seem pretty out of touch with some things these days. I hope he enjoys his retirement.

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