Kevin Marshall's America
No diggity, no love for Blackstreet?
One of the strangest things I saw on New Year’s Eve this year (our house party was relatively tame) was the performance on Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rocking Eve by NKOTBSB.
The group is a combination of late 80s boy band New Kids on the Block and late 90s boy band The Backstreet Boys.
At first my mind couldn’t process this evil combination, but then I came to appreciate it. What a brilliant way for both groups to make money well past their expiration date and craft it into something new. It’s also so shamelessly self-aware – everything old is new again – and borderline meta.
I won’t buy a ticket, but won’t fault those who will and applaud whomever came up with the idea.
Conversation at the party turned to how awesome it would be if they were instead New Kids on the Blackstreet Boys – with NKOTB, the Backstreet Boys, and late 90s New Jack Swing group Blackstreet. This got me to thinking of how we can combine any number of old acts into something new, weird, wonderful, and terrifying in the way that thrills you and sends your pulse racing.
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New Kids, Inc. on the Block
(NKOTB + Kids, Inc.)
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N*SYNChronicity
(N*SYNC + former members of The Police)
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Pet Shop Boys II Men
(The Pet Shop Boys + Boys II Men)
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The AeroSmiths
(Aerosmith + The Smiths)
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Savage Gadda da Vida
(Savage Garden + Iron Butterfly)
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The Duran Duran Escape Plan
(Duran Duran + The Dillinger Escape Plan)
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Electric Deee-Lite Orchestra
(Deee-Lite + Electric Light Orchestra)
—
Belle & Sebastien Biv Devoe
(Bel Biv Devoe + Belle & Sebastien)
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Bananakajagoogoorama
(Bananarama + Kajagoogoo)
—
Miami Against the Machine
(Miami Sound Machine & Rage Against the Machine)
—
Nickelback
(Bon Jovi + Cinderella – the modicum of talent both bands possess)
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16 Responses to New Kids, Inc. on the Blackstreet Boys
Leave a Reply to Pam Cancel reply
STALK ME
I thought it was a little weird….like a bunch of people’s uncles dancing and singing.
New Middle Aged guys In the Burbs
BackStreet Men (Featuring Lower Back Pain)
Have we forgotten Men At Work + Men Without Hats = Men Without Work
“Men Without Work” is pretty much everyone I mentioned in this blog post.
Very, very fun sir!
Bananakajagoogoorama and Duran Duran Escape Plan might be my faves!
Thanks much
Very funny Kevin. I caught this disturbing “combination” of NKOTB and The Backstreet Boys, but as I was flipping through channels, I found something that might just be worse: Did you see the Rick Springfield performance? OMG it was like a car accident that you just don’t want to watch, but you can’t look away … oh, my eyes.
Thanks for the morning laugh.
I,too, was extremely disturbed by the images I witnessed on New Years Rockin’ Eve. I had to turn the channel because I empathized with, and therefore was embarrassed for, their families. Please move on with your lives and let the younger hipsters have their day in the sun.
Pet Shop Boys II Men is my favorite. Also, I think Duran Duran Escape Plan would be better than anything DEP’s done in the last decade.
Chris - In fairness, I think Duran Duran Escape Plan would be better than anything ANYONE’s done in the past decade. On a more serious note – I dug Option Paralysis (DEP’s last LP) on the first couple spins. Haven’t listened to it in a while, though, so you’re probably onto something.
Angie - We had the TV on mute. I did see him at some point but didn’t know it was Springfield until I looked it up on Google. He looked ridiculous, like the guy at the club wearing make-up who thinks nobody can tell he’s wearing makeup but oh my God that guy is SO wearing makeup.
U2 Live Crew. that would be sonic nirvana.
gs - Gold!
That performance on New Years Eve was atrocious! When I saw Donnie Wahlberg up there, I said that his brother called him and said, “man, what are you doing? do you need some money?”
I think both NKOTB and Backstreet Boys signed some clause back in the day that requires them to do performances now.
Sad…Sad…
Beatallica is amazing!!!!!
Oh it’s too bad Rob Pilatus is no longer with us. Because if he could rejoin Fabrice Morvan, and if they could go on tour with a Canadian soul singer and Judy Garland’s daughter, you could have – brace yourself, folks –
The MINELLI VANELLI MILLI VANILLI TOUR!!
Pre-recorded background tapes optional, of course… :)
GG Allin Parsons Project. prog pooping.
those guys really made me feel old. and I loved Keisha saying her resolution was not to be a d*&bag for new year’s eve. Classy.
How about old with the new.
Sha Na Na + Lady Gaga = Sha Na Gaga
TV On the Radiohead
High On fIREHOSE
James Gang of Four
Simply Red House Painters
Simply Led
Green Daylight Dies
Mr. Big Business
Queen of Leon