“I’d Have to be Crazy to Let My 5-Year-Old Tan,” Says Overtanned Crazy Lady

I mean, just look at her.

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Important thing to ask: what kind of scummy tanning place would look at that woman and take her money and allow her to continue tanning? In fact, let’s extrapolate that further: what person working at a tanning hut wouldn’t see that woman walking into the door and try to set her on fire thinking that they were the victims of a Mummy attack?

"It's close to miiiiiidnight, and something evil's lurking in the dark..."

Also, what’s weirder, the woman in this video or the hosts of “Today” not acknowledging at all that what we just saw was absolutely bizarre and gross?

IN OTHER VERY IMPORTANT NEWS: oh shit, there’s a fucking bear in Albany! The Times Union has dubbed it the “South End Bear,” which is also some guy’s username on a dating site. I guarantee it.

EVEN MORE IMPORTANT NEWS: